Happy 14th Birthday!

I’ve been thinking for awhile that I should add a blog to my site.  Thinking turned into action last week when I set up the structure for this blog.  Once in place, I had to face the next question: what to write?  As June approached, my questioning intensified.  I knew that the new month, filled with the new beginnings of school vacation, was the right time for me to begin this next phase.  But what to write?  Does my work end with the pages written in The Pro-Child Way: Parenting with an Ex?  Or is there more left to offer those parenting after divorce?  Of course, the universe weaved it’s magic once again, and the answer came to me in a flash today.  The flash of a camera, capturing my older daughter’s 14th birthday on the first of June.

In my camera, there is now a picture of my daughter, surrounded by family.  HER family.
    1.    Her mom (that would be me).
    2.    Her sister (my 2nd daughter)
    3.    Her dad (my Ex of 12 years)
    4.    Her step-mom
    5.    Her sisters (my Ex and wife’s 2 daughters)
    6.    Her brother (my Ex and wife’s son)
    7.    Her grandmother (my mom)
    8.    Her great-grandmother (my mom’s mom)
    9.    Her aunt (my sister) and husband
    10.  Her 3 cousins (my sister’s children)
          Corralling this gang, was my partner who was very good at getting smiles from everyone.

While some of her out-of-state family were not there, and the dog wasn’t invited inside, it still made for a very full sofa.  When the flash went off, a gentle kiss from heaven whispered: “job well done” in my mind.  “Yes”, I smiled back. 

Immediately, the young children scattered in chaos while the adults went back to talking.  In the midst, was my birthday girl.  Totally oblivious to the special moment that was swirling around her.  Sure, she was smiling and very pleased to be celebrating her birthday, but the fact that HER family was surrounding her was no big deal.  Just like when I was 14 and my family surrounded me at my birthday.  If it wasn’t for the pictures, I wouldn’t recall that my family surrounded me—it was a normal, non-eventful, totally predictable non-event that only would have been remarkable if I hadn’t been surrounded by my family.  I’ve never been so please to create a non-event for my daughter! 

Thirty years from now, will my daughter remember that her family attended her birthday? She’ll probably shrug and say, “Why wouldn’t they have?”  And I will still be smiling right next to her.

Website by: The SiteWell